Another Day

My sister came up and just left. I find myself sad now. It's a good feeling, the missing of someone. A day full and made. We went up to Bonny Doon and tried wine. So many people there, who would have thought? We stopped in the Attic, the best beat salad I've had. I want it to be natural. I want it to be obvious, of course she would be there. The whole time my mind gleaned for things to say, topics to bring up, I go digging in this trunk. That's how my mind works. How do we ring in each other? and What matters? and what's on her mind? and would she lay it out for me? the current, the happening, the worries, that fight with B* the other night. I wish I was more current.
Like I was thinking, I wish people would see me through, would return, would come back. Do i turn people off? as interesting as I sound, or can make myself appear through these lines, I don't think I'm very. I don't think I know much. I know too little about too much.
where is my anchor. Like Children when they draw they anchor their page with a sun. That sun in the corner.
I'm not much of an anchor, i'm not much substance. I don't rub off. I don't hold.
like do i stimulate anything in my sister?
do i make people want to come back for me.
I want to be more than decoration.
I wish I made atmosphere.