Scottie passed, my beloved friend scottie.
Scottie! you arranged your life the way you wanted. yes Scottie, we said Ciao bella! to me b/c i was just back from Italy then, i said Ciao bello! to you.
Scottie was the paralyzed man that I worked for, I was his editor and caretaker, i'd come up to his house on west cliff and work on his book, trying to make out his words which were jarbled and gruntful, but i got your language, and i knew your facial expressions too. when i saw you in the hospital, with the trachiotome you could not talk but i knew you were laughing when you rolled your eyes up and to the left, and lifted your chin, that is your face when you laugh. and i can see your grin, your wild smile, you were the most rambunctious man, though crinkled on the couch, i emailed your buddies you've known your whole life, those same guys you were in the rocknroll band with in the early 70s, i'd email your daughters, i emailed your granddaughter for you, and you always ended her emails with "do you know how much your grandpa loves you?" or "don't ever forget how much your granddad loves you." and we all circled around you scott, we came to you like a magnet. all your attendants, your friends, your family. you were a cornerstone in this town, you grew up here. i was the hostess at your last birthday party in december, you were 52. . . .
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God speaks to each of us as he makes us, then walks with us silently out of the night. These are the words we dimly hear: You sent out beyond your recall, go the limits of your longing. Embody me. Flare up like flame and make big shadows I can move in. Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror, Just keep going. No feeling is final. Don't let yourself lose me. Nearby is the country they call life. You will know it by its seriousness. Give me your hand. Rilke
2 comments:
God, molly, I don't mean to use the lord's name in vain - I think it applies in praise to the miracle of the intersection of Scottie's life and yours. What a beloved old soul. What beuaty and poetry in what you've shared. It makes me want to cry.
I am praying for you sis and that you would continue to see beauty of lives even in the midst of any sorrow.
bro Mike
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thankyou so much for the outpouring. i want to cry too. the goodness of us, some of us we know, and some we've never met, yet witnessing each other and holding each other and saying yes back to the words we write, and keeping up. thankyou for being there!
in Him.
sister Molly
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