I am in a new land

There has been dammage done, but it has been passed on. I have a knowing now, and I can see the bigger picture. and the thing is, it's going to be ok with my friend. and there is going to be healing. but for me, i feel like i am in a new land. like i don't feel threatened. like i don't feel menaced. like it's not happening and happening over and over again. like he has passed. God, is this exactly as i prayed for? That you would cut before me? That you would cut before me? cut, as you cut the covenant it is the same word. as you cut before the israel as they crossed the jordan. as you cut the covenant with Abraham. and the smoking pot passed before the sleeping Abram. Gosh, im not feeling unsafe as i have. i'm feeling like i've been circumcized, like something has been put off