there is nothing unsubtle about the Lord. This is what I feel strongly this morning. He is There. the spirit is There, when my life keeps veering into ways i could have never imagined would be enticing to me. I feel out His ways, as some things glow, some things just seem to carry nothing.
When Jesus found me on March 13th, for the first time ever, I felt him in my body. in the most intimate way, and the light and brilliance poured UP. as in a spring. and i can't even believe that still b/c that is how it is told in the bible. And incredibly, He knew that's what he had to do to reach me specifically. as a woman and as the MOlly, ive been super sensitive to any sensation in my body. and yes i am more of the feeling plane. so i pay careful attention to this vehicle of mine. and the energy that it carries. and back when, I used to be into the "goddess" as it seemed that that was the only way a woman could trust God, a "god" that menstrates or has hips or something, a strong figure who understands our plight. but it only took one "we moon" calendar of trite female paintings cliching the female body and earthy and blah blah, for me to have enough and for me to be completely bored by the whole concept, now [DISCLAIMER] this was many years ago, possiblly 2000.
I realize now that this need to try to worship a "goddess" or the earth mother is just a very contemporal attempt to feel good and build an alternative to the "patriarchy" and yes, maybe that is an unfortunate situation, but it is just a reaction to our times, and to our gender, and to this age. it is not the eternal Being. And it is just worshiping ourselves, mirrors of ourselves. I don't thing God would be play favorites like that. God couldn't be on any one side. God is for all. And He continues to give to us in the way that we need. He continues to show up. to show up for us in every capacity. I'm blown to see how God moves men and women alike to swoon so in love, and to capture the poor, the rich, the wild ones and the tame. we're in this rodeo together. it's completey renewing and captivating and freeing.
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God speaks to each of us as he makes us, then walks with us silently out of the night. These are the words we dimly hear: You sent out beyond your recall, go the limits of your longing. Embody me. Flare up like flame and make big shadows I can move in. Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror, Just keep going. No feeling is final. Don't let yourself lose me. Nearby is the country they call life. You will know it by its seriousness. Give me your hand. Rilke
3 comments:
Speak it, sistah!
Amen! You write so beautifully, Molly, of our eternal loving Father, of our Lord Jesus, of the Spirit that indwells us and unites us. Thank you for your beautiful and inspiring expressions of your faith, of your love.
God, Molly (in praise to our Father - not mean as taking His name in vain... / *weak excuse* =(
I've been perousing (sp) your copious, ingenious, and insightful writings and am re-reminded what awesome insights and talents our Jesus has given you. All I can say is an "Amen" to Camille's "'[Amen]'" I know our Jesus is going to continue to do some pretty awesome things in you and through you for the rest of your days. I love the archive of your blog and how it traces your insights and experiences throughout the months.
In Him,
mike
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