Permanent

Just finished a 12 hour Theophostic Training. My whole world/spiritual view is blown. GET TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH. READ THIS POST. How Jesus wants us to be whole and free. So Theophostic is rooted in the belief that emotional pain experienced in a present situation is as a result of a mental associal to a historical event from childhood being triggered. What Theophostic does is invites the Lord to take that person to the origin of their pain, (the person doing Theophostic does not make any suggestions or offer any advice, they mearly ask questions and allow the person receiving to take them to the memories that are revealed). Then the Lord is invited to bring truth to the situation, and like that Jesus can come into a memory of a tramatic experience and speak truth. And it's amazing because going through this process can bring Permanent change and lasting healing. It's about getting past tolerable recovery, settling for healing that we have to maintain. No it's about being free and free indeed. I think when Christ really comes in the situation and brings light and truth, the trama, the wound is unplugged. It is about not standing on top of your pain, but the pain being over. that unbearable pain. It's like turning on a light in a very dark room. Once you turn the light on, the darkness is gone immediately. and the darkness can't come back to the room, the darkness can't remain. And this is important, it is important that we correct our history, not to invalidate the fact that we go through genuinely awful things. but we can correct the lie that is implanted, or the imprint, whether it is a lasting sense of not being good enough, a fear of rejection or abandonment, a sense of being alone, etc, etc. We can go into those memories which are containers for lies and bring christ into them, and release the lie that has woven itself into our whole life.
But what I do want to share is some amazing insight.
When we forgive, we are asked to forgive not the person or relationship but the debt. the debt. like the story in the bible when the king asked to servant to take account. He did the inventory of the debt and he forgave the debt, which was unpayable. So in otherwords we are not asked to forgive the person or the relationship, that would take reconciliation which takes the other person giving an account of their wrong, it would take the other person coming clean. and this does not usually happen in life, right? we have these people who are never going to fully get it, or fully admit, or fully show-up. Right? The broken relationships with father, etc, and guess what everybody. WE don't have to forgive that whole relationship. We can't reconcile unless both people in the relaitonship are willing. But we CAN forgive their debt. Like in the story of the king who forgave the servant's debts, First he called him to "settle the account." And the servant he owed so many minas it would have taken more than a lifetime to payback. In other words, the debt was unpayable. And isn't this the case with those people who have wounded us, especially our family? Like let's say an absent father, is that payable? not really, you can't get that time back in your childhood, even if he did apologize or realize or what not, that loss or offense would not be payable. So you see this parable is very strong in its likeness. So the King in the story, though the debt is huge, forgives the man's debt. Now the man does not owe him anything. And think of the Lord's prayer. Jesus asks us to forgive those for their trespasses. for their actions, their debts. I am so relieved for learning this slight new angle. WE are not asked to reconcile a relationship, but just forgive the debt the person owes us, their actions. this we can do.
And let me tell you, all the terror of that situation, of that past relationship after going into the stuff, then seeing that person 2 more times last week. That terror has melted away.. I feel that he doesn't owe me anything, like there is no debt. Their is no need and no more violent fear.
Here is another thing I learned from yesterday: a misconception is "I can never be free until you are healed." being dependent on another person getting it, or doing what we project to be the right behavior towards us, for us to be enabled or OK. And no! we can be free when we are free. I'm not limited to you. I'm not limited to those people who have wronged me.
And the cool thing about this, is it just really speaks to the person. You can try reasoning or counseling someone for hours about how logically some chiildhood event was not their fault, or logically show them tools for when they get triggered to realize (with Logic) that they are reacting from a so-and-so need, and you can tell them great phrases about how they are not in that tramatic state so they can let go of it, and etc, etc. but that is logical truth, and our experiential truth speaks larger than the logical we keep on our bookshelf. and man, that logical truth is darn hard to really coat some unbearable early memory with. And weve all done this, wehere we tell another a logical truh and then when our own stuff comes up, we still feel those darn feeling which we know to be untruthful in our minds, but still feel yanked on just like we're back to being that little boy, or little girl. So this is putting the light and truth in the experiential knowledge, and to grasp it in every way today.