lack

God be my ladder. God be a thick ladder that's right in my way please. b/c I feel so much lack, and i'm so sour about waiting. And that' no good, and are you just so dissapointed? I want to come clean, I want to be on it. I want damp in your Glory. I want a finished circumcision. The kind where I make it to the other side, The kind where I really cut off the chaff. I want to wait on you with gladness. when i focus on lack, that's not dwelling in you. I have a hard heart a lot lately. God I wish you would change that. I think I need to start serving. It's that time of year when that downness tugs on me. when i look around and am just lonely.....but I get stuck in that and that is putting my energy where it doesn't need to be.......ok i'm not writing so well now. but that's ok